Life of late still feels very rushed. In the weeks since our last post I’ve put together more furniture, completed more home improvements, seen a dog join and then leave the household, oh and I’m an assistant manager now. One could say I’m in need of a vacation though lord knows I hate those so fingers crossed things start to settle down around here. Still; change seems to be in the air damn near everywhere, including the snack aisle where summer fare is giving way to fall flavors and new discoveries. I actually came across new Halloween candy at the tail end of July. Before I’m overloaded with pumpkin spice and maple it’s probably best we do a new snack report.
Seeing as this post is woefully behind schedule and I’ve been overloaded with new snacks, a lot of these reviews are going to be rapid fire affairs. I’m talking stream of consciousness stuff here just to see if it’s possible to cover everything. The addition of several fall and spooky items means this also counts as our first step into the most sacred season of the whole year. Without further pomp let’s get this mother rolling.
Cheez-It Snap’d BBQ, Parmesan Ranch, Smoked Bacon Cheddar
The Snap’d line from Cheez-It was already a big winner with just their basic flavors but never one to rest the company decided to pump out some new goods, presumably for a limited time. The Parmesan Ranch variety was alright, decent enough as a limited item but not totally deserving of a permanent spot in the line. Bacon Cheddar was a step up by offering the flavoring of TGI Fridays Potato Skins without the mouth-shredding texture. Without a doubt the big winner was BBQ with just the right balance of smoke, sweet, and crunchy. I’d advise picking up all three if possible but if you’re bound by a tight wallet at least nab some BBQ.
Hostess Sundae Cupcakes
For some odd reason the new batches of Hostess goodies are getting harder to find in this area. At the very least I was able to find these Sundae Cupcakes once, just once mind you. Overall they’re not all that different from traditional cupcakes with that fatty/chemical Hostess allure. Still decent enough for a lunch item.
Little Debbie Jelly Creme Pies
Out of freaking nowhere I came across a Little Debbie variety I’d never seen nor heard of. The concept involves a sort of cross-breading of the companies cherry cordials, crème pies, and a spot of strawberry jelly. The result is so damn tasty. Like this is easily one of Debbie’s finest accomplishments in recent years and yet it’s completely under the radar. So far I’ve only seen these at Wal-Mart so you may have to venture there to find em. Of course if you’re anything like me a regular wally-world snack trip is penciled in somewhere on the calendar.
Shrieker Skittles
Expanding on the concept leftover from zombie skittles these new shriekers have random sour candies riddled throughout each bag. What makes this sort of fun is how the sour level somewhat depends on whatever the original flavor was meant to be. In my personal experience the sour green apple pieces seem to take the title for top pucker power.
These are a major improvement over zombie skittles in nearly every way. The package design is clean yet festive, sour candy is a much easier sell than rotten corpse flavor, and the base flavors are good to boot. My personal level of repeat purchases is gonna come down to how crazy this season gets but so far these make for a damn fine start to spooky shenanigans. About the only issue is that the random sour spikes can give you a craving for consistently sour candy. I’d say at least a four out of five.
Cookies & Scream M&M’s
On the more comforting end of Halloween candy are cookies and scream. Gotta give some props to the design team on this packaging. It manages to walk the line between clean modern aesthetic and classic Halloween with good use of colors. The taste isn’t all that nutty or unique but the execution is solid and satisfying. It’s actually pretty easy to curb your sweet-tooth with a quick handful. Another excellent early entry in this years Halloween offerings. Four outta five, easy.
Turkey Hill BBQ Cracklin Strips
Alright so these aren’t new items per-say but they’re new to me and my continuing quest to find the best cracklin. The bbq flavor adds a fun twist to the base cracklin but in this case it’s a little too sweet and falls short of being quality pork snacks.
Bavarian Meats
Another odd surprise these bavarian meats may be the best mass market meat sticks I’ve ever come across. Salty, meaty, and earthy in just the right mix with an excellent texture that begins with a crisp snap of the casing. Problem is I haven’t found them anywhere closer than a gas station 30 miles away. Still; if any of you jerky lovers see em in the wild there’s a great treat.
Bombay Sapphire Raspberry Blackberry Gin
Recently I’ve started to scour the novelties of the booze aisle like peanut butter whiskey (stay away from it) and this new offshoot of Bombay Sapphire. They’ve taken the classic gin and infused it with berries. Sound’s like a guaranteed winner o what’s the final result? Well it’s sorta like good robitussim. Not really bad per-say, just not living up to its potential. The real trick is having the right drink to mix it with as it pairs especially well with tea. Very much a novelty item though that will only please a handful of people.
Little Debbie Unicorn Cakes
Lord knows what dark ritual initiated the incessant wave of unicorn and mermaid themed items that have clogged up shelves over the past few years but the fact remains that I can’t resist a shiny new snack cake. Sadly the actual item is fairly generic overall with little outside of their presentation to separate them from other snack cakes. They taste good enough but you’re not missing anything by giving em a pass.
Japanese Kit-Kats: Orange and Crushed Almond & Cranberry
When it comes to Kit-Kats and Doritos nobody outdoes Japan. The land of Kaiju never ceases to come up with new varieties of these American snack staples while the parent companies leave us in the dust. The occasional trip to an Asian grocer or world market can help close the gap however which is how I got my mitts on two different Kit-Kats from afar.
Orange Kit-Kat reminds me of what those Terry’s Chocolate Oranges might be like if they didn’t suck. Not only is the flavor balanced much better but the additional element of crunchy wafer helps it all go down smooth. The big find however is the Crushed Almond & Cranberry Kit-Kat which manage to prove that candy can in fact taste classy. It’s not too fruity, or nutty, or chocolaty, just this glorious blend of sweet and comforting.
Puchao Gummy Candy.
I’ve crossed paths with Puchao countless times yet always managed to skip over them thanks to timing, budget, what have you. Not making that mistake any longer. Not only is are the fruity flavors quite satisfying but the texture, that’s what sells it for a fan of chewy stuff. They work so well thanks to the two separate candy elements, one being the outer gummy with spongy beads inside. They’re a lot of fun and their individually wrapped presentation makes em perfect for work.
Pocky Tasty
Tasty isn’t exactly the most detailed flavor description so you’re likely wondering the same thing as me, what are these? Basically think of em as deluxe pocky. They use ingredients like charred milk and fermented butter to offer a richer version of traditional pocky. The biscuit stick is a little thicker as well. These touches may not sound like anything all that special but it adds up to a very different experience than traditional Pocky. Problem is these don’t quite scratch that casual snack itch the same way regular Pocky does. In a way it’s almost too refined for it’s own good.
Zapps Evil Eye Potato Chips
Been a big fan of Zapp’s chips for a few years now, still hold the opinion that Gator Tators are the ultimate sandwich topping. These Evil Eye chips came out quite some time ago with it wasn’t until a few weeks ago that I finally found some. They whole idea is that they’re a hot, spicy, Cajun treat but the proved to be a bit divisive in the family. I personally found em underwhelming, couldn’t even describe much of the taste to you. My nephew on the other hand openly declares these as his favorite potato chip. So these are either totally forgettable or a mana straight from heaven.
Bakerly French Pancakes
Here’s an odd one. Bags of pre-made, room temp, pancakes you can bust out whenever you want. No special flavors, fairly simple ingredients list. It’s on tap pancake and that’s just fucking tits. Sure I’ve had better overall pancakes, and bigger ones no doubt, but the sheer convenience if this item is unrivaled. You don’t even need to microwave em if you’d feel like it. Just grab one outta the bag.
Fruity Cereal Kit-Kat
Not to be completely outdone by Japan, the U.S. branch of Kit-Kat unleashes their third or fourth flavor of the year with the new fruity cereal variety. Honestly these are pretty solid, though I’m not sure if they’re as good as the Key Lime ones that are still readilly available. Gotta call them out on a big booboo though. The package shows a ring shaped cereal like Fruit Loops but these are way more Fruity Pebbles with that pronounced coriander flavor. If you’re a pebbles fiend definitely give these a go.
Lays Cheetos and Funyuns Potato Chips
Lays went deep into corporate synergy territory this Summer with a trio of chips flavored like other snacks. The Cool Ranch Doritos variety continues to elude me which is a shame as one of these is absolutely phenomenal. Let’s start with the less successful version then, Funyuns.
Full disclosure; I hate funyuons, always have. Dusting a chip with that flavor was always gonna be an uphill battle. By themselves these are pretty much pointless as they don’t do enough of any one thing to stand out nor do they manage to really work as a regular chip with that sweet and pissy onion taste. However they’re fairly decent on a sandwich and thus not entirely without merit. That being said my usual ratings would leave this somewhere around a two out of five.
Cheetos Potato Chips on the other hand, oh my god these chips. Lays had somewhere taken the experience of licking the Cheetos power off ones fingers and translated that perfectly onto a chip. It’s lunacy, possibly outright sorcery, but goddamn is it ever tasty. That’s a five outta five for those bad boys.
Dolce De Louche Toast Crunch
Nearly forgot about this one but don’t take that as a comment on its quality. The troubled history of caramel and dolce cereals is well documented with most efforts missing the mark. This one though is some good shit. There’s enough of the original toast crunch taste to even out the dolce elements in order to make a tasty and satisfying cereal. I’d actually like to see these stick around as they’re one of the better toast crunch spin-offs.
Salted Caramel Brownie Oreo
Talk about one that nearly got away. I passed these up the first time I saw em because I was already buried in sugary treats only to see them vanish from shelves. Weeks later one of the local stores had the good sense to restock at least a little. The wait was absolutely worth it too as, much like the Dolce De Louche Toast Crunch, show a marked improvement in how companies are handling caramel items. I know there’s a big group of salted caramel haters out there but the wizards at Oreo found a way to make everyone happy by mixing in brownies. The end result is something with that salty, burnt sugar taste but with an excess of chocolate to keep everything in line. The only weird part is that dipping the cookies in anything activates the salt even more but they’re still damn good.
Apple Cider Donut Oreo
Here’s one of two items I picked mere hours ago. We’re talking first impressions territory here. The new fall Oreo is too big a topic to sit on though and it looks like they’ve got a real winner this year. Only had one cookie so far sans milk or coffee and the experience was rather surprising. Instead of tasting like a cider flavored donut the whole thing come across more like what happens when you dipp a donut into a proper class of cider. There’s even more of a refreshing moisture component at work here. Can’t wait to see how they fair with liquids but so far so good.
MTN Dew Spark
Spark actually came out summer of 2020, a lousy time for any product launch, as a Speedway exclusive. Somebody was smart enough to give it a second round for those of us who stayed away from people last year. The whole idea is raspberry lemonade dew which sorta comes across as ruby red squirt mixed with dew. Only had about a third of a bottle so far but as now it stands as a mid-tier Dew.
At last I think I’m caught up on snacks. You may have noticed a few items in the pictures I didn’t even talk about since there hasn’t been time to try everything just yet. It’s time to start making… time I guess. Updates have been sporadic to say the least but we’re right on the cusp of spooky season and now way am I letting that slip by. Most likely I’m gonna have to switch to smaller but more frequent posts to pull that off though I don want to talk about another Ultra series before we officially bring out the pumpkins and bats, says the guy whose already been buying decorations for a month and a half. Gotta get back to work on other thing but you guys sound off. Lemme know what’s you’re looking forward to in the next few months and any topics you’d like me to touch on.
No comments:
Post a Comment